How to promote the Toy if your off the grid man?

[bettheopositeofwhatyoudo]

Originally Posted by Becky

oh good grief....
Get a proper job, Loser.

Becky is our Saviour:
Because: “Hell” is a place of torment for unbelievers. The final place of eternal torment for unbelievers is the lake of fire (Rev 20:10), but they will not be sent there by TOY until his final act of judgement!!

[Becky]

It continues ...

Oh I have, just to limit the clicks.
Plenty of time for the tormenting tho, work away.
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bran Sun 15-Apr-12 21:47:39

(BTW I'm loving the "nice clothes and handbags" detail <snigger>)
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iklboo Sun 15-Apr-12 21:49:34

Hey fellow sisters! Who's up for a pillow fight in our jim jams? Pass the Lambrini <sings Look At Me I'm Sandra Dee>
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SuePurblyBusinesslike Sun 15-Apr-12 21:49:47

Wimmin's Bits, innit?
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KellyKettle Sun 15-Apr-12 21:51:35

grin
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Sunnywithachanceofshowers Sun 15-Apr-12 21:52:48

I've reported - sorry all smile
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KellyKettle Sun 15-Apr-12 21:53:08

Hey Becky, your sideline sounds great. Money for nothing is right up my street. Is it legal to use this software?
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BeckyLovesToys Sun 15-Apr-12 21:53:28

Oh please ... you lot don't do us women any favours do you?

Shame on you all ...

[stomps feet up the stairs]
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StickingLaboutin Sun 15-Apr-12 21:53:47

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha - have a Pombear. I love that website. I can't wait to earn some money for handbags and girly trinkets.
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LowFlyingBirds Sun 15-Apr-12 21:53:59

Yay iklboo!!!!!

I'm in for the lambrini-fuelled pillow fight, just have to give hubby a quick bj cuz i got my eye on some gawjus new shoes!!!
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RowanMumsnet (MNHQ) Sun 15-Apr-12 21:54:22

Thread's going to go pfft in a moment, just to warn you

MNHQ
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SuePurblyBusinesslike Sun 15-Apr-12 21:55:41

Onoes! I broke a nail on the pillow <sadface>
Now I will have to sit around talking about lipstick and Tampax all night. Again.

<offers round a tray of Babycham>
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bran Sun 15-Apr-12 21:56:04

Am I reading this correctly - you were going out with a man (who bought you nice clothes and handbags, was he from the 1950s?). He told you how he made his money and since then you have been making your own money and have traded him in for a new man?

That seems a bit callous towards the original boyfriend, did you give him back the clothes and handbags? Are you now buying nice clothes and manbags for the new man?
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LaurieFairyCake Sun 15-Apr-12 21:56:26

this is hilarious grin
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purits Sun 15-Apr-12 21:56:36

Beware g--r--eeks bearing gifts.

ivykaty44 Sun 15-Apr-12 21:56:58

spoiling all the fun...
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LaurieFairyCake Sun 15-Apr-12 21:57:01

Shall we have a pillow fight girlies???

in our underwear??
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Bohica Sun 15-Apr-12 21:57:36

Leave the bastards
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SuePurblyBusinesslike Sun 15-Apr-12 21:57:38

Let's do makeovers!
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purits Sun 15-Apr-12 21:57:56

Dang. My strikeout didn't work. <girly giggle>
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KatieMiddleton Sun 15-Apr-12 21:58:06

hahahahahaha!
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iklboo Sun 15-Apr-12 21:58:29

Apparently pillow fights is against elf & safety. Looks like it's a game of 'true, dare, kiss, command or promise' instead.

KatieMiddleton Sun 15-Apr-12 21:58:55

Actual lol at "we're doing it for ourselves"
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LaurieFairyCake Sun 15-Apr-12 21:59:37

Would anyone like a Milk Tray?

<proffers cheap, nasty choc only old men buy>
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snice Sun 15-Apr-12 21:59:37

'spin the bottle' anyone?
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Bohica Sun 15-Apr-12 21:59:58

you lot don't do us women any favours do you?

We have offered you babycham and soft pillow talk, I must go and run my husbands bath for him, I need to sweet talk him into buying me some glittery shoes I saw today that match my new eye shadow.
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SuePurblyBusinesslike Sun 15-Apr-12 22:00:00

I prefer the game 'Man, Troll or Wanker' iklboo. Do play.
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Coconutty Sun 15-Apr-12 22:00:31

so, I was seeing this person once and he was a Nigerian Prince, but he needed all my bank details to get his inheritance, and then he stole all my money but he did love me and it was great, so if you get an email from him, give him all your details too
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snice Sun 15-Apr-12 22:00:47

we should all talk about our bowels now and recommend yoghurts to each other
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bran Sun 15-Apr-12 22:01:07

Laurie, not fair, you've already eaten all the caramels. All that's left are the coffee/strawberry creams and the ones with nuts in. Nobody likes those! <sulks>
LowFlyingBirds Sun 15-Apr-12 22:01:19

SHAG, MARRY, KILL!!!!!

I wantz to do all of it to becky and her toys lolzzzz
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KatieMiddleton Sun 15-Apr-12 22:01:33

If you didn't like the OP's website, can I suggest you try mine? www.money-for-old-rope.com?
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iklboo Sun 15-Apr-12 22:02:03

Laurie - when I first started my periods my nan phoned my dad at work and told him 'your daughter is a woman'. Poor bugger brought me home a box of Milk Tray as a present. Still not sure who was most embarrassed.......
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SuePurblyBusinesslike Sun 15-Apr-12 22:02:08

Have you been bloated, snice? I have. Bloated and sluggish.
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LowFlyingBirds Sun 15-Apr-12 22:02:15

My stools have been difficult to pass just lately sad

What can I do girls?
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KatieMiddleton Sun 15-Apr-12 22:02:52

Have you tried putting all your meals in your handbag instead of eating them LowFlying?

solidgoldbrass Sun 15-Apr-12 22:03:30

Try some bumsex LFB (wonders if this will be the precise point the thread detonates)
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LowFlyingBirds Sun 15-Apr-12 22:03:33

Bed soon.... got to be up early for a bit of roller-blading-in-white-jeans action
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schobe Sun 15-Apr-12 22:03:49

'us women' lolol

I just love how misogynistic their 'research guy' must have been to think that this would really get us at our level, man.
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snice Sun 15-Apr-12 22:03:56

lets sneak around and look in our hostess's fridge for her secret

[bettheopositeofwhatyoudo]

Originally Posted by Becky

Beware g--r--eeks bearing gifts.

I've just realised how did Jesus feel among the nonbelievers...

Sad, sad world
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4N3N1MlvVc4

[Becky]

and there's more ...

SuePurblyBusinesslike Sun 15-Apr-12 22:04:36

I'm off to find my secret stash of chocolate and look at my shoes for a while.
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iklboo Sun 15-Apr-12 22:04:54

Oi - hands off my Ryvita!!!!
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LowFlyingBirds Sun 15-Apr-12 22:05:22

Oh i dont have actual meals obv....just share the odd pudding
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snice Sun 15-Apr-12 22:05:46

my MIL keeps giving me packs of Perle du Lait that she gets from Home Bargains-is she trying to tell me something?
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KatieMiddleton Sun 15-Apr-12 22:06:02

I've made you all something on Ryvita. Because I ****ing hate you.

My real friends get Lambrini and Kettle Chips.
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solidgoldbrass Sun 15-Apr-12 22:06:43

Twiglets, anyone?
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LowFlyingBirds Sun 15-Apr-12 22:06:46

And sgb - already do the bumsex. Every time i fancy a new blouse.
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Grumpla Sun 15-Apr-12 22:07:03

Oooh snice can you recommend a solution? Some sort of yoghurt-based dessert that might enable you to shit yourself thin?

<quaffs Lambrini, fiddles with hem of flannel pjs baby doll negligee>
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snice Sun 15-Apr-12 22:07:05

<links arms and sings 'We are Family'>
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solidgoldbrass Sun 15-Apr-12 22:07:37

Snice: Dunno, what is Perle Du Lait? Are you supposed to eat it, drink it, bath in it or have sex with it?
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Bohica Sun 15-Apr-12 22:08:10

I only eat tissues and apple pips. I have to bite and spit the apple to get to the pips.
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solidgoldbrass Sun 15-Apr-12 22:08:24

If it's messing up your blouse I think you might be doing it wrong.
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snice Sun 15-Apr-12 22:08:50

It is an overpriced yoghurt-based dessert that will make you shit yourself thin apparently-AND its French so v.exotic
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KatieMiddleton Sun 15-Apr-12 22:08:56

Well it tastes revolting so I can't believe anyone actually eats Perle Du Lait. That's why they're all so thin.
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mamalovesmojitos Sun 15-Apr-12 22:09:05

grin
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solidgoldbrass Sun 15-Apr-12 22:09:33

Bohica, did you not hear that apple pips have cyanide in and if you eat too many you will actually die?
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youarekidding Sun 15-Apr-12 22:09:41

Damn I wasted my time reporting before I got to MNHQ warning us it would go pfft.

I put so much effort into my "dodgy thread?" message too grin
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solidgoldbrass Sun 15-Apr-12 22:10:21

Urgh, why not just stick a hosepipe up one's ring for a bit of DIY colonic irrigation?
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Novascotia33 Sun 15-Apr-12 22:10:55

much amusement at 'us women', what a tool you are Monsieur Becky.

'Lurvely sideline' ahahah.

That ain't no way to talk to a Sista, Bitches
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bran Sun 15-Apr-12 22:11:07

Perhaps Bohica will die SGB, but she'll die thin. <nods head approvingly>
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solidgoldbrass Sun 15-Apr-12 22:11:17

If there's any justice in this world (to quote the grammar-failure Lemur) this thread would end up in Classics rather than Straight To Hell.
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Grumpla Sun 15-Apr-12 22:11:41

I actually quite like Milk Tray.

Not so much the hosepipes.
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SuePurblyBusinesslike Sun 15-Apr-12 22:12:38

Aw, don't let it pfft MNHQ. Just remove the link.

I am learning so much about being a woman <adjusts trousers wiv luverly hairy hand>
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BeckyLovesToys Sun 15-Apr-12 22:13:02

Is that it? Is that all you ladies have got? I bet your men walk all over you and yes, I bet you clean and tidy for them don't you? I can afford to pay someone to do that for me, so there ... [raises nose in the air]
youarekidding Sun 15-Apr-12 22:13:02

Hosepipes are banned grumpla Get the chocolates out and share
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Sunnywithachanceofshowers Sun 15-Apr-12 22:13:36

You ladies? Do **** off OP.
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KatieMiddleton Sun 15-Apr-12 22:13:37

So Becky, where did you learn to speak woman? I'm thinking service station caff or ad exec office. Am I close?
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snice Sun 15-Apr-12 22:14:05

PMT Becky? You're very grumpy
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KatieMiddleton Sun 15-Apr-12 22:14:26

Don't be daft Becky. Dh does it and you can't even begin to imagine just how much he earns...
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youarekidding Sun 15-Apr-12 22:14:30

Yep Becky, my man walked all over me as I showed him the door to the street.
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solidgoldbrass Sun 15-Apr-12 22:15:20

The French are buggers for that sort of thing though. When I was a teenager on a school exchange visit I ended up consuming a lot of mineral water with added natural diuretic that they headn't mentioned 'for ze slimming' and wondering why I was spending half my life dans le pissoir.
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youarekidding Sun 15-Apr-12 22:15:44

SGB grin
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BeckyLovesToys Sun 15-Apr-12 22:16:08

I feel so disheveled, will someone please pass me a wet-wipe ...
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SuePurblyBusinesslike Sun 15-Apr-12 22:16:29

Indeed. I clean and then I even clean.
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youarekidding Sun 15-Apr-12 22:16:55

to clean up the shite your spouting?
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iklboo Sun 15-Apr-12 22:16:59

I don't know about perle du lait but DH can give me a perle du necklace if it means he will buy me that divine wee frock, shoes & handbag I've circled in <some posh wimmins mag>.
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Novascotia33 Sun 15-Apr-12 22:17:49

wet-wipe???? Are you speaking from the 80's Becca?
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SuePurblyBusinesslike Sun 15-Apr-12 22:18:55

Ooo yes, remember them in their handy wee pot? Only for car journeys though, we weren't made of money.
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whoknewthat Sun 15-Apr-12 22:19:59

Now I'm upset they've deleted the original link.

I missed it sad
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Bohica Sun 15-Apr-12 22:20:12

I died two times yesterday I thought it was due to all the cleaning and tidying I was doing for my milk tray man.

And now you tell me it is the apple pips shock I'll stick with just tissue from now on.

Thanks lovely MN'ers you are as always supportive and full of sensible advice.

Luff you girlies x x
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shrinkingnora Sun 15-Apr-12 22:21:09

I love toys too, Becky. Shall we talk about toys? I have been longing to confide in another woman about my love of er.... the hot wheels track that is taking up half my sitting room And I am very partial to my Bob the Builder play set. Which toys do you love Bex?
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Bohica Sun 15-Apr-12 22:21:21

I still have it whoknewthat grin
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doctordwt Sun 15-Apr-12 22:21:23

Step away from the apple pips Becky m'luv
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LaurieFairyCake Sun 15-Apr-12 22:22:04

I love that Perle du Lait shite - particularly the lemon one.

I wanted to hate it cos of the adverts but it's cheap on Ocado at the moment so I've bought about 30.

Doesn't make me shite more though hmm
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LowFlyingBirds Sun 15-Apr-12 22:22:14

SuePurblyBusinesslike Sun 15-Apr-12 22:16:29
Indeed. I clean and then I even clean

grin

So do I actually. On both counts.

Wise word becky, wise words....
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youarekidding Sun 15-Apr-12 22:22:21

Any one else see the irony of the op being deleted (as in post) and being told any replies may be deleted. hmm

grin
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KatieMiddleton Sun 15-Apr-12 22:23:01

It's probably just biding it's time Laurie.
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LaurieFairyCake Sun 15-Apr-12 22:23:58

grin

waits for wet follow-through fart....
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LowFlyingBirds Sun 15-Apr-12 22:24:21

O
M
G Bohica.....

Tissues are like the main the main food group to cause bloating. Have you not considered dust?

[doubleback]

I think we should get back to religion, it's much safer territory than those crazy women over at Mumsnet ...

[The Geek]

Funny, I always thought Becky was a man too.

[LuckyYou]

Originally Posted by Becky

I have certainly gathered some interest ...

So, I was seeing this bloke a while back, he made his money at home on the computer ... he didn't half do well at it and bought me nice clothes and handbags all the time. I couldn't believe the amount of money he was making ... naturally, I started asking questions about his methods and he explained what he was doing ... long story short, he uses A Geeks Toy which is an amazing piece of software that is 100% free - so this isn't spam ... he places bets using the software on Betfair, he showed me a few profitable strategies and I'm now earning decent money and got a new fella! Check out the software, it's 100% free ...
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Novascotia33 Sun 15-Apr-12 21:35:45

Becky, everything is fine, but why the hell did you tell the other women that you are playing too? You should just tell that hes continuing to buy you clothes and stuff, and should recommend the other ladies to tell their husbands/boyfriends about the toy. I know DB is a pro and showed you all the stuff you need, but most of the women don't like the "w" word (work) They just love presents

[lcredd]

reading that mumsnet stuff scares me, those women are ****** up.

[1/4 of a millionaire fund]

Originally Posted by The Geek

Funny, I always thought Becky was a man too.

The scary thing is they're also using this alter ego on other sites too

[the blue frog]

nice one i am also a big fan of AGT , but not on any social networking sites nor do i intend to be in fact if i ever start winning again i,d rather pay for the toy !
the blue frog

[Southwest]

I hope that post doesn't get more women on the site as I heard their periods attract bears

[TradeShark]

Originally Posted by Southwest

I hope that post doesn't get more women on the site as I heard their periods attract bears

[lcredd]

Originally Posted by Southwest

I hope that post doesn't get more women on the site as I heard their periods attract bears

I tried explaining to the wife why that was funny. Bad idea.